Are you an introverted business owner? You might like to use these words I’ve created. Although jokey & light-hearted, there’s an element of truth to each! 🙂
I recently wrote taglines for Pawnee businesses, which included Tom Haverford’s Snake Lounge, Tom’s Bistro and Rent-a-Swag.
But Tom had several business ideas that didn’t get off the ground (which you’d expect from a jet that’s been turned into a wheel-less apartment block). His entrepreneurial concepts may not have been tried, tested or even legal, but they certainly delighted, intrigued and bewildered. In my opinion they’re all worthy of their own humble taglines. Hope you enjoy them.
The official Pawnee website states that Pawneeans are ‘moderately well educated’, making Pawnee an ‘acceptable’ location for business. With such accolades it’s little wonder Pawnee is home to Fortune 500 companies like Paunch Burger.
Pawnee business owners pride themselves on the existence of a form of customer service. For example, if Entertainment 720 was still around today, they’d happily facilitate, perform and botch the 720 surgeries required to transform me into Li’l Sebastian. Sweetums would assist by donating NutriYum bars to turn my teeth pony-rot-brown. And Jamm Orthodontia would ‘horsify’ my jawline and gums in exchange for my soul.
I miss the slightly unethical peeps of Pawnee. To ease my longing, I’ve written some fun taglines for various Pawnee businesses, brands and departments.
These hilarious road signs remind me of bad, pun-based taglines. Want to have a giggle? Check them out!
It’s tempting to roast this road sign writer for creating whirly, twirly messages rather than short, blunt, clear, live-saving ones. However, I actually think he or she has done a fine job of keeping everyone safe. If I was driving along this vast stretch of road dotted with dotty signs, I’d be freakishly alert.Read More…